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My Monster

Schubert Dog, Schubey Doo, Chi-Whippet

Photos by Michael Parsons


(aka: The Schubes, Little Monster, Snaggletooth, etc…)

Because my canine companion is a big part of my life, I feel the need to introduce him. The incredibly handsome creature you see here is my dog, Franz Peter Schubert Arnold. Obviously, he is named after one of my favorite composers, not a brand of (delicious) rolls. I adopted this amazing animal, while living in Little Rock, through The Humane Society of Pulaski County and for the last 3 years he has accompanied me on many adventures, including moving to NYC.

Fabulously Awkward Girl and Schubert; Liz and Dog

Schubert and I usually have the same reaction to situations.

Important Schubert Facts:

1.) He was once attacked by a wolf (yes, like White Fang), so is socially awkward when on his leash…he thinks he can make friends with other dogs by barking ferociously as they approach.

2.) Schubert is a HUGE fan of hiking and being outdoors, which is why we go to Central Park as often as possible and also a major factor in why we will someday need to live somewhere with easier access to the great outdoors.

3.) Unlike most dogs of his little-bitch-dog breeding, Schubert is perfectly well-behaved and does not run away when off leash…he also ceases being a socially awkward barker when in this state of freedom.

4.) I will never date or be friends with someone who does not like Schubert. End of Story.

5.) While I do not know what the romantic tastes of Schubert’s whore of a birth mother were, he has the basic coloring/build of a chihuahua, is super fit, has awkwardly long legs, jumps like a mountain goat, and runs like the wind. So, I ‘ve decided he is what will someday be known as a Chi-Whippet (miniature Greyhound meets Mexican rat dog….If you’ve ever been to the dog track in Memphis, this combination is not more than feasible).

6.) Schubert has a tattoo. It was given to him by the PCHS while he was getting emasculated…still unsure as to why.

7.) Most importantly, Schubert has a fierce snaggletooth that is impossible to miss. Some say this is his most endearing quality and has earned him such nicknames as “Snaggle,” “Snagel,” and, my personal favorite, “little monster.”

Schubert, Dog, lap dog, tired dog

My little monster

Don’t forget to follow this fabulously awkward girl!




7 responses »

  1. That picture of Schubes in his classy-as-fuck bow tie is AWESOME!


  2. Yes, that bow tie is ass-kickin. Love it. Great description and glad to here that you found each other at the HS.


  3. Damn iPhone auto correct… the word is “hear”. Glad to know would have been better. Where the hell was Siri when I needed her? lol


  4. I thought you were a little monster, a lady gaga fan because of the title. Too bad your not.


  5. I have 3 x Jack Russell Terrors Terriers that bark ferociously when other dogs approach. Don’t think they have ever been attacked by a wolf though – they just don’t like other dogs (but are absolute angels around people)



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